Confidence: Quite simply, it means Freedom from Doubt, A Belief in Yourself and Your Innate Abilities. What I like to call ‘your Genius’.
Now, I think many people believe that confidence is…
- Genetic (you had to be born with it)
- Only available to those that are attractive or fit
- An attitude that is gifted to you
- Something your parents were supposed to teach you
- What you feel only when everything is right and perfect in your life
- Based on where you live or went to school or what degree you hold
- Only for the wealthy
I’m going to challenge all those beliefs because I say confidence comes from knowing who you are and what you are here to share. Knowing what you do well that brings benefit to yourself and others. It could also include clarity around the message you are sending out to the world.
When you know how to communicate what you want, what you care about, what your innate gifts are and what you have to offer, then there is no doubt. To spin that in a positive way, there is CONFIDENCE.
When you feel and know that you are getting your ideas and thoughts out and you are being heard, that’s the first step in feeling confident. Having freedom from doubt instills confidence.
When you are capable of understanding others, seeing who they are and allowing them to communicate with you in their style, then you are giving them a gift. The gift of confidence; you’re honoring them and they’ll feel heard by you and understood. It reminds me of the movie Avatar, when they greet one another with the phrase, “I see you.” This is a wonderful skill, to be able to really see and know someone. This is the second step in instilling confidence is having belief in yourself and your ability to see and hear others.
There are a series of stages to move through as you cultivate this feeling of confidence. It’s available to you and all of the ‘beliefs’ listed in the bullets above NEED NOT apply.
The 3 Stages to Effectively Communicate with Confidence:
The FIRST stage is to check in with yourself. Who are you? What matters to you? What events in your life have shaped you? What message do you have that you are excited to share with the world? How do you want to be treated? You will answer all these questions by how you show up. By being aware of your Appearance, Body Language and the things you Say, you’re showing others who you are. The choices you make in those 3 categories give you a peek into your own Psyche.
Is what you are projecting (from this inner place) the truth about who you are? Learn the signals that you are sending and make sure that it is the message you want others to receive. Are you being your authentic self or (like all of us) have you been trained to project out who others want you to be?
The SECOND stage is to make conscious choices. Once you’re clear about how you’re perceived and the signals you send out, then you can become aware of and more aligned in regards to the message you speak.
When aware of this knowledge you’ll have the power to send messages you desire. You’ll get a better feel for how they’re going to be interpreted and received. That will, in turn provide you with a confidence boost! You’ll be able to tweak that message any time you desire based on your audience, situation, ideal client or person you’re interacting with. Best of all, you’ll be free from thinking you should be like someone else. This will empower you to be fully your authentic self.
The THIRD stage is to honor those around you. You’ll quickly learn about others and become more understanding of who they are, their gifts and their challenges. You’ll have an ability to see them and honor them. As you honor yourself, allowing you to be your authentic self, you’ll be more accepting of everyone else. You’ll easily see that everyone has inherent value. When you are more accepting of others and their journey, you become Charismatic. You begin to exude CHARISMA. People like to be around others that are accepting of them just the way they are. Learning about someone else’s personality will make it easier to communicate with them. Our gifts and challenges are what make each of us infinitely unique. The ability to apply this with others is where the real magic happens!
Move through these 3 stages to effectively communicate and you’ll exude confidence! It will have an impact in your life, your business, how you feel about yourself, your relationships and your finances. You’ll carry yourself differently and you will approach every task with an expectation of mastery.
Confidence is a beautiful thing. It isn’t elusive…it ‘s yours when you apply these stages to what you are already doing.
Are you ready to step into your Confident self?